Sometimes I try too hard and react too hastily. Three possibilities can save the day and prevent further injury or escalation. By good fortune, my misperception may be interrupted as in my first example below. I may check in to clarify before reacting, as in my second example. I may reach out to a colleague for perspective and support as in the final example. The examples I am about to share, while not named, are representative of a broad range of diverse social locations, differing races, genders, religions, faiths, left- and right-leaning, even though not specified below. (Client stories I recount have been read by these … [Read more...]
Welcome to 2022 and to Martin Luther King Day weekend!
(This blog post ends with a UNCG sponsored public event in honor of Martin Luther King, so please read to the bottom!) My day began with my son, who lives with autism, reading me a quote from St. Francis of Assisi entitled “Stages”: Start by doing what's necessary; then do what's possible; and before you know it, you will be doing the impossible. What a good reminder this is as we face a new year with a world dominated by all the uncertainties of COVID, the growing efforts to build a better future in a world dominated by systemic racism and oppression, and a climate crisis! There are a few contexts for which I personally draw … [Read more...]
For October’s post: An Attachment Injury EFT “Nugget”
I love writing about EFT and AIRM, but for October I decided to make a video in lieu of a written blog post. In this 7-minute video, I'll be talking about working with a couple in distress after an attachment injury. Please enjoy and share! … [Read more...]
It’s August. It’s time to rest and revise!
June and July 2022, some of the hottest summer months on record in North America, brought massive wild fires! Formerly celebratory holidays at the beginning of July in both Canada and the USA became days of mourning and cultural reckoning. Outside and inside, fire and dry tears burn with growing anguish and recognition of the residuals of colonialism and slavery and how I as a white person am part of this oppressive system! Given that I am white, hetero, cis female and that EFT was traditionally developed by white clinicians with white clients in a dominantly heterosexual context, I realize that my best efforts at times are hurtful. The past … [Read more...]
Love or Indifference?
“We are obsessed with love and relationships. But what do we really know about love?” These are the opening words of Dr. Sue Johnson’s 2013 book Love Sense: The revolutionary science of romantic love. Ever since that book was published, I have made it my mission to explore how this search for love pertains as relevantly to individuals not in romantic relationships as to those who are. Love We know that love, as defined by attachment science, means that we are bonding mammals needing a safe connection with at least 1 or 2 others in order to survive and thrive. There are no options. Without human connection we die. The search for secure … [Read more...]